{"id":47,"date":"2021-10-23T20:47:03","date_gmt":"2021-10-24T00:47:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/?page_id=47"},"modified":"2021-10-24T21:36:18","modified_gmt":"2021-10-25T01:36:18","slug":"allonormativity-and-amatonormativity","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/about-asexuality-and-aromanticism\/allonormativity-and-amatonormativity\/","title":{"rendered":"Allonormativity and Amatonormativity"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>What is allonormativity?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Allonormativity is the assumption that all human beings are allosexual, i.e. that they experience sexual attraction to other people. However, it is important to note that<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0some groups, like the disabled community, have been and still are \u2018desexualized\u2019 in media representation and real life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>What is amatonormativity?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Amatonormativity is the assumption that all human beings pursue love or romance, especially by means of a monogamous long-term relationship. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">The term was coined by Elizabeth Brake, in her book <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Minimizing Marriage: Marriage, Morality, and the Law<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\"> (2011).<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Examples<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Allonormativity:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Equating sexual inexperience with immaturity<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Medical professionals assuming that lack of sexual activity is cause for concern<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Assumption that sexual liberation means having sex, that not having sex means you are repressing your sexuality<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Many queer spaces and resources emphasize sex over other forms of queer relationships\/identities<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Amatonormativity:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Assuming that everyone wants to get married, and unmarried\/unpartnered people are unhappy or lonely<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Treating romantic relationships as more important than friendships<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">The structuring of society around married couples (housing, taxes, etc.)<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u201cDo you have a boyfriend\/girlfriend yet?\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>What harm do allonormativity and amatonormativity do?<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Aspec people feel broken or like something is missing<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Lack of sexual desire or libido can be seen as inherently a medical issue that needs to be fixed<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">People feel pressured to date or have sex even if they don\u2019t want to<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">People who are single or in nontraditional relationships (polyamorous, open, queerplatonic) are looked down on by others and by society<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Romantic relationships are expected to take priority over friendships<\/span><\/li>\n<li>People who are not in romantic relationships may be left out of conversations and events which revolve around couples<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>What can we do?<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Acknowledge that not all people experience sexual and\/or romantic attraction, and not all people desire a long-term, monogamous romantic relationship<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Challenge assumptions that romantic\/sexual relationships must be the most important relationships in someone\u2019s life<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Challenge structures that give couples benefits over single people or people in polyamorous relationships<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Educate others about these concepts<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Promote ace and aro creators and support ace and aro representation in media<br \/>\n<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is allonormativity? Allonormativity is the assumption that all human beings are allosexual, i.e. that they experience sexual attraction to other people. However, it is important to note that\u00a0some groups, like the disabled community, have been and still are \u2018desexualized\u2019 in media representation and real life. What is amatonormativity? Amatonormativity is the assumption that all&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3927,"featured_media":0,"parent":8,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-47","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry","empty-entry-meta"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/47","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3927"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=47"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/47\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":96,"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/47\/revisions\/96"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.smith.edu\/aace\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}